Disapointment

I guess disapointments are for reasons, but while you are going through them you have NO idea why the hell Jesus allowed it, and it bothers the gutts out of you. I guess it's all for the greater good, even though right now I have no idea what certain things mean in my life and I don't think I will ever know, I just have to accept. Some things are easy to figure out, like if it has to do with guys maybe he wasn't the right guy or wtv...blah blah blah, but with some other things, like not someone not showing up for a super important appoitment....argh ok. One day.

Bluey

so once apon a time I decided to be sexy...(hehe I can't get over the glasses)

Party Time

We wanted to have a New Years party with our friends, so around the 6th of January (can't remember the exact date) we had one, here are the pix.

mommy and son :p ok we both look a little retarded 

the 'band' preparing

Jason singing 'Outrage' ...had that song stuck in my head the rest of the evening

everyone is into the hand signs now-a-days

and we preformed too, but it's not like we practiced, Mandy and I knew the same song so we were like lets sing it, but it went kind of off time and key and stuff. Next time we'll be better.

Some people loved us...haha

Than the guys did another song

audience reaction (don't look for me I missed that song)

  circle of boredom

some inspirational person trying to get us to play capture the flag

the ONLY picture of David, and he was trying to hide, evil! :p

That's all for now, hope you all have an awesome year, and that you had awesome parties, I mean this was a good party, but SO many things happened. I heard so many 'unfinished stories' it was weird, but all in all it was great. 

Hurt

Sometimes people hurt you by mistake and sometimes they do it on purpose, the thing is how do you know when it's intentional and when it's not?

I wish I had the answer to that, and I wish I could just decide if the person is still worth being friends with after they hurt you, even if it was on purpose. I don't know everyones life, and for all I know they could have done it to prevent themselves from greater hurt, or to keep a friend, or maybe they are just trying to please you. Me personally, I HATE FLATTERY, I'd rather you tell me you hate me to my face, then act all nice and hate me inside. I can deal with hurt like that, what I don't know how to deal with is hearing things which hurt from someone else. Every person is selfish, no one is completely selfless, I most definitely have a lot of times when I made decisions that will hurt others only because it benefits me. What I think every person should consider when they make a friend is ‘what can I do for this person’ not ‘what can this person do for me.’ A lot of my friends have been there for me when I have had trials and problems, and I tend to think because I have had it good in the past I expect it to be the same now. But that is not possible, sometimes people have to look at what they can give their friend more then what their friend can give them. It is really hard for me to be friends with people who hurt me, my attomatic reaction is how can I cut of contact, how can a person be worth being friends with if they don’t give a damn about the way I feel. But maybe I should look at it as: they don’t have to consider me a friend, I will still be there for them and help them no matter what they do to me. Care for the person but don’t expect them to care for you, that’s how it is these days. That way when they do something in the long run which shows they didn’t care the whole time, or you find out something which they did which is super mean it won’t be so bad, maybe it will still hurt, but then you can always think; “I knew this was gonna happen.” Hahaa well I just made it sound like no one can ever be trusted, that is not true, just you have to find the right people, and never give everything because everyone is human, I bet I hurt people millions of times, some maybe intentionally and some I don’t know about and never will. And I can honestly say I care about my friends feelings, now how does that click? It doesn’t, it all comes down to being honest with yourself and giving more than you take. No one is perfect and everyone makes mistakes. Therefore I decided instead of running away from my problems I should face them, decide what will help others. If they hurt you pay them back with good deeds. Don’t be stupid and let them control you, but don’t try to control them either. It won’t pay of in the long run.

That is what I think and what I believe….

Confession: This is acctually writen to a certain person, but I am way to shy to send it to them :p so I don’t know if the person still reads my blog or it was just a one time thing, but even if it never reaches the person it’s good for me to get it out, and maybe it will help someone else. 

2011

I started this blog in 2009 and am happily still running it in 2011, I feel so proud of myself *grins*

Anyhow 2010 has been a very weird year, weird in a good and bad way, but then again, all the bad things that happen end up turning into good lessons or something, so I guess I could say weird in a GOOD way. 

So last year I:

-Finally got my own guitar

-Saved money for the longest I ever have in my life (9 months without spending barely anything)

-Made friends

-Lost friends

-Did 3 shoots for commercials

-Taught kids every Friday (except a few being sick or wtv) starting in June till December

-Went to a really awesome camp in Rizal in July

-Moved houses (again)

-Went to Jason Derulo's concert

-Barely got sick

-Got 2 childhood diseases, German measles and chicken pox, (those are the only 2 I ever had) 

-Got bitten by probably over 1,000 mosquitoes (reason I thought of that is cuz my foot is itching from a mosquito bite right now)

-Turned 16 (obviously)

-Improved in my art

-Watched all the Harry Potters that are out for the first time

-Fell in love with Ron Weasley (btw I don't believe in falling in love with movie actors/characters but I like to pretend I do) 

-Listened to some really awesome songs, learned to play some also

-Drew a friend and Ron

-Dyed my hair

-Changed my style

-Needed Jesus

-Got addicted to Facebook (thank God I'm not anymore)

-Had a great New Years (don't want to mention Christmas)

-Got into tonz of arguments and problems with people, some to the point of 'no more talking'

Ah...I ran out of things to say, I'm sure way more good and bad things happened, but over all I guess I can just be thankful, even for the times when things didn't go well, I can be glad for my Christmas even though I went through a lot on the 24th and 25th. I can be glad at least I still have people who care about me, I still have a place to live, and I am still alive without some form of deadly sickness. There are so many things to be happy about and ya, I think I really need to start looking at the good in each situation. :) Yes there were times last year when I made a complete idiot out of myself, and there are times when I really felt helpless and that my life was a living hell, but through it all I can say it was a year worth living, I would never want to repeat it, but I am thankful for everything...I am thankful that I am alive and that I can move on to this new year and make it the best year yet! I'm expecting it............... 

Clockwork Angel

I just finished the Clockwork Angel, it's a prequel to the super awesome book series called the Mortal Instruments series.

Back to the topic to Clockwork Angel, it was a really book but it's amazing how Will (the guy) could do that to the girl....I loved Will the whole book until the end, seriously I hope the next part comes out soon, and I hope Tessa (the girl) pays him back worse than he was to her! :p 

Anyhow, you should read the Mortal Instruments series...they're the BEST! :D :D :D