Fix It

When you try your best, but you don't succeed

When you get what you want, but not what you need

When you feel so tired, but you can't sleep

Stuck in reverse

And the tears come streaming down your face

When you lose something you can't replace

When you love someone, but it goes to waste

Could it be worse? 

Lights will guide you home

They say the darkest hour is just before the dawn, and What doesn't kill you just makes you stronger. Things will work out, I just gotta believe they will.

Quote

Life is to be enjoyed not just endured

Day 30

Day 30: Your goals for the next 30 days.

Lately I have come to the conclusion that I probably am anemic, as I have been sleeping a lot 

and not ever feeling rested, so one of my goals is to get enough iron back into my body and to feel better. 

• To have a great 21st birthday. 
• Get a reply for college.
• Renew my Hungarian passport and get all the paperwork I need to do done.
• To keep in touch with new people I meet.
• Get out of meeting with a certain family once and for all. 
• Make a bunch of new dream-catchers

I am now happy to announce that I have finished my 30 Day Challenge. I know it took more then 30 days to complete.

I did enjoy writing about my life on here. I will now go back to occasionally posting when I am in the mood and

have time. 

Bye bye. 

Day 29

Day 29: List 10 people, dead or alive, you would invite to dinner. Include the dinner menu.

I really thought about this question and how I would use this situation. First I thought I'd invite all of my friends from around the world and use the opportuinty to see them. After a while of thinking though, I realized I would for sure use the fact that I can invite people who aren't alive anymore and invite my sister and therefore make it a family dinner so everyone could meet her. That way I'd have 9 people already, I can't decide on a 10th because it would have to be a relative and I can't just invite 1 grandparent, so maybe my aunty.

We would have tacos.

This question was by far the weirdest, along with the one about 'someone who fascinates me'.

Day 28

Day 28: Something that you miss.

That is a really difficult question to answer as I miss SOOO many things. 

I miss food from different countries I have been to that they don't have in Hungary:

Zagu, yema, dried mangoes, slurppies, strawberry banana juice, pizza in Italy, different sweets from each country etc. 

Not to mention food that they have here but are really expensive to buy:

sushi, steak, shrimp etc.

I miss people doing shopping and cooking dinner for me, not having to go places alone, being walking distance from my friends houses, living in the same city as my best friends, having stores super close to my house, not feeling tired amongst other things. 

Day 27

Day 27: A problem you have or have had in the past.

So now this 30 Day Challenge is making me complain.

Tiredness

That is my biggest problem right now, I'm always tired, and looking forward to the weekend so I can sleep. The reason why I am so tired is because I never have a day when I don't have something important to do after work, and most of the time that thing involves leaving the house and not getting home till at least 9 p.m.. I always say I'll catch up on sleep on the weekend but that rarely happens because I always do so many things on the weekend that I don't have time to rest.

Basically my problem is curable but I'm enjoying my life too much to stop and relax, which makes it not that bad after all.

I am glad that is my biggest problem at the moment. I am really blessed.

Due to my tiredness I find lame things really funny and have to share this with you:

Whoever did this probably didn't consider the fact that tattoos are permanent, or they just consider them self a very funny person. Either way WHY????

Day 26

Day 26: If you had $ 1,000,000 to spend, how would you spend it?

I would put half of it in a savings account and the rest I would use on the following: 

• College: I would find out if there is Early Education and Childcare courses in English in Hungary and go to college here, if not I'd go to England and do a really good course there
• Living Expenses: For while I'm in college
• Traveling: Go see Ireland, Spain, plus a few other countries during my holidays and to visit my family
• Clothes and shoes: Yes, I am a girl and would love a ton of clothes and shoes

I'd calculate how much the above things cost, keep a little extra for enjoying life and things like furnishing the apartment I'm gonna live in, then give the rest to my family.

It snowed a lot today.

Day 25

Day 25: Someone who fascinates you and why.

I failed this 30 Day Challenge with this question. I tried so hard to think of anyone who could possibly fascinate me. I listed a ton of people in my head and came to the conclusion that there are things that fascinate me but not people. 

So I will leave this post lame and empty. I'll try to make up for it with my next post.

Here's a picture of me by the lake looking contemplative.

Day 24

Day 24: Your favorite movie and what it is about. 

That is a really impossible question to answer. There are millions of movies in the world, how can anyone choose a favorite?
One movie that I really love and have seen at least 6 times though is Juno.

It is about a 16 year old girl who gets pregnant by mistake, and how the guy, her family, friends and the future adoptive parents deal with everything. It is funny and has good actors.

Day 23

Day 23: Post 5 pictures of famous people you find attractive.

These aren't necessarily the people I find most attractive, but the first 5 sexy celebrities that popped into my head.

 Christofer Drew Ingle

Aaron Johnson 

Ian Somerhalder 

 Miranda Kerr

Nico Mirallegro

So there you have it, 5 beautiful people.

Day 22

Day 22: How have you changed the past 2 years.

I have changed a lot in the past 2 years. 

2 years ago I was: living with my family, doing a course which I took a break from high school for, I was in a "serious" relationship, didn't have any friends in Hungary or even hardly go out, I was super emotional about everything and I wished I could live anywhere else. 

Now on the other hand, I moved out, I am working, I have applied for some colleges and hoping I will be accepted, I am not in a relationship, I have quite a few friends here, I am barely ever home, I'm not so emotional anymore and I wish that I could stay in Hungary but I have to move. 

So my life has kind of taken a 180° turn in a lot of ways. My personality is pretty much the same, I think I have matured somewhat, but if I didn't over 2 years that would be really bad. 

I don't look different at all though.

Dec. 2012

Dec. 2014

Day 21

Day 21: One of your favorite TV shows.

Since I have already written a fair amount about How I Met Your Mother I will choose a different show to go on about. So now I will introduce you to an amazingly great and hilarious show that everyone should watch called Scrubs.

I watched this show back about a year ago and once I started I could not stop watching. It has everything you could want in a series; comedy, drama, suspense etc. It is 9 seasons long, and even though the last season isn't the greatest, the other 8 are perfect. If you haven't heard of it before then you haven't lived life to the fullest. 

WATCH IT NOW!

-Yes I know I sounded like an advertising agent, but you cannot talk about a favorite TV show without promoting it in some way.

Day 20

Day 20: How important you think education is.

This is a question I can talk about for a really long time but I will try to sum it up as not to bore everyone. 

I think education is important for everyone up to some point, only through learning can you form a new skill. The educational system of today on the other hand is a pretty big waste of time. For an example up to this day I have never used trigonometry, algebra or most of the chemistry and physics I learnt in high school. Yes there are important things to learn in school but I think everything you need to know you learn in elementary school and after that is just a lot of brain stuffing. Now-a-days if you don't finish high school you are considered dumb, but in reality a lot of really rich people never did high school because they were busy making money. 

The only way you can ever pursue a subject is through being educated about it, whether through text books or hands on learning. Also everyone needs education about life. How to dress yourself, eat, obey rules, read and write are things you learn at an early age but without knowing them you wouldn't get anywhere in life. Therefore that makes education the most important thing in the world because without it you couldn't do anything. 

Day 19

Day 19: Your biggest regret in life.

I wish I had not stopped drawing and playing guitar, but I wouldn't say those are exactly regrets. One thing I really wish was different though was that I didn't forget Spanish as a kid. When I meet Spanish speaking people I always think 'I'm supposed to be able to speak it too'. but unfortunately I was a really stubborn kid and didn't want to speak it, so I forgot the language. 

In general though I don't regret anything. There is this quote:

That is my motto, I don't want to live life with regrets.

Day 18

Day 18: A book you could read over and over again and never get sick of.

I am not really a book person so I don't think I could read any book over and over again. A book series I could read a few times though would be The Mortal Instruments by Cassandra Clare. They are a 6 part series of the greatest books I've ever read.

Day 17

Day 17: Your highs and lows of this past year.

Since 2015 just started and not that much happened I will write about 2014 instead. 

A lot of really great things happened in 2014: 

• I got to travel to Slovakia and Italy 
• I went to a festival 
• I helped with a camp 
• I had a really fun 20th birthday
• I made some good friends
• I worked quite a bit on my scrapbook
• I made some really good dream-catchers

Some of the lows were:

• being too stressed out
• getting sick 
• having the worst toothache ever that even the strongest painkillers didn't help
• baby sitting for this family that was really weird
• spending a lot of money on dentists
• spending a lot of time waiting at hospitals 

As you can see most of the highs of my year were going places and most of the lows were physical pains. I really did enjoy 2014 and have to say it was one of the best years of my life for sure. 

I had sad times, and got depressed a bit, but I think I learnt a lot about my self last year. I really learned to control my emotions and am proud of my progress. 

So there you have 2014 in a nutshell.

Since I mentioned dream-catchers I want to post my latest one that I just finished last night.

I feel very content with it!

Day 16

Day 16: Your views on mainstream music.

I think it really depends. Some of the really famous bands are really good and some are so stupid. Let's start with the song Anaconda by Nicki Minaj; I don't think songs like that should ever get famous, like seriously what is wrong with people who like it? I understand Nicki Minaj has a nice voice and some of her songs are decent, but a lot of stuff she writes is horrible. On the other hand I really like Katy Perry, I think her voice is super nice and most of her songs are also nice. Her latest hit, Dark Horse, isn't my favorite but you can't judge a singer by one song. I also really like Maroon 5 and Rihanna has some nice songs. On the other hand Miley Cyrus makes me wanna barf and Selena Gomez's music is so whiny. Wiz Khalifa and Flo Rida have fun songs to party too but aren't really my style. But hey everyone has their own taste and if they want to listen to crappy music that is their life. So I can't say I have a certain view on 'mainstream music', I just think it varies depending on the artist.

I will have to say though that mainstream music is not as good as other music. The best bands are normally the not-so-famous ones as they usually really sing from the heart and don't just write some junky lyrics to be played on the radio or in clubs.

Day 15

Day 15: Write 15 interesting facts about yourself.

1. I am in the process of making a yin yang dream-catcher

2. I love my life

3. I recently found out I'm allergic to dog fur :( 

4. I really want a new phone but won't buy one

5. I had hip piercings for 3 months

6. I love snacking on the delicious cheese I have in my fridge

7. I am going to one of my student's birthday party today

8. I don't understand people who prefer fries without ketchup

9. I wish I could tune my guitar without a tuner

10. I never go a day without drinking at least 2 liters of water

11. I collect snow globes

12. In general I cut my own hair and therefore always have crappy haircuts

13. I am listening to Of Monsters and Men 

14. My room is a mess

15. I don't like having long fingernails

Day 14

Day 14: Your earliest memory.

I have a few memories of when I was really young, I am not exactly sure which one is my earliest memory though. I remember some details about my 5th birthday, how I had a jewelry box cake and how it was celebrated with another kid whose birthday was 3 days before mine. I also remember the first time I went to a circus, I am not to sure how old I was, I remember there was a boxing kangaroo. I remember living in a caravan for 2 months with my family, we were just 3 kids at the time. We were next to this other family and I always hung out with their kids, I remember running after their older sister when she was on roller blades, how we used to sneak into this bowling place and switch everything on and everyone would play while I would wonder around. Playing with play mobile, reading stories with my mom, playing with my dad while my sisters napped, going to my grandparents late at night once because there was a huge storm, getting in trouble for not wearing shoes outside and not being allowed to leave the caravan when it rained. 

Those are all the really early memories I have from my life, I am sure there are more, but I can't remember right now.

I just remembered the earliest memory by far, once when I was around 3 or 4 I gave this girl who was visiting my favorite stuffed toy, a swan, because she was sad. Also waking up super early from my sister singing really loudly when she was less then 1.

Day 13

Day 13: Somewhere you'd like to move or visit.

I want to see the world! This is a very broad topic and I could probably write a book explaining each country I want to visit and why. I doubt anyone would read that though so I will stick with 3 countries that answer this question. 

Ireland: The place I would like to visit the most in the whole world is Ireland. To be honest I don't really know why I am so fascinated by that country, but I really, really want to go there for St. Patrick's Day. I have recently been told by an Irish that St. Patrick's Day is over commercialized and mostly the foreigners there celebrate it and the Irish prefer to stay at home or even leave for that holiday. So I have a huge feeling that when I finally do it I will be disappointed, but I will still get around to it one day. I am also very interested to see the landscapes, castles and coasts of Ireland. I can imagine it being amazingly beautiful.

Spain: I have so many reasons for wanting to go to Spain. First, my dad is from there and I feel like I could finally learn Spanish properly if I would go there for a month. Also whenever I tell someone I am half Spanish they always ask me what kind if place Spain is, or how much I like it, or some even try to speak to me in Spanish. It is really embarrassing for me to have to answer with 'I am learning Spanish and haven't been there since I was 5 so I don't know anything about it'. A lot of people have told me it was their favorite country they have ever been to, and I would really like to go see it for myself. I also love the Latin culture and would love to live there for a few years some day.

Switzerland: I have been to Switzerland 4 times in my life and I love it. Everything is so high class and professional and my dream is to live there for 1 year. I can imagine living there for a long time wouldn't be that great as it is so strict and I would probably go crazy, but give me 1 year of perfection and I will love it. 

Switzerland 2013

Day 12

Day 12: Bullet your whole day.

• Woke up at 6:45 and got ready for work
• Got to work at 7:30 first child came 15 minutes later
• Watched the kids play, gave them breakfast, got some ready for ballet, took the rest outside
• Circle time, watched Winnie the Pooh, gave them lunch, kid broke a plate, brushed their teeth took them to nap
• Chatted with a friend, watched Friends
• Woke the kids up, gave them snack, let them play, worked 1 and a half hours extra cuz my coworker couldn't come in today so finished at 5
• Went over to the school to find out about my other coworker moving into my room
• Got blown off and encountered an awkward situation so went home
• Skyped a friend for 2 and a half hours 
• Worked out some getting into college stuff
• Chatting and blogging

That was a lot of detail, but it did say to bullet my WHOLE day

Day 11

Day 11: Put your Ipod on shuffle and and write the first 10 songs that pop up.

1. Rat Trap 666 -Die Antwood

2. Move Like You Want -Ben Howard

3. Volcano -Damien Rice

4. Criminal -Fiona Apple

5. Older Chests -Damien Rice

6. I'm Already Gone -A Day To Remember

7. You're Not Good Enough -Blood Orange

8. Champagne Coast -Blood Orange

9. Heartless -A Day To Remember

10. Why'd You Only Call Me When You're High -Arctic Monkeys

I just put new music on my phone and to be honest the only song I even know out of the 10 is the 10th one. 

Day 9 and 10

Day 9: If you could have any job in the world, what would it be?

There are a few jobs that I see people doing that make me thing: 'I'd love to try that', but none I'd consider as a carrier. There are only 2 jobs that I could imagine myself doing full time, 1: Kindergarten Teacher, which is what I'm doing now. 2: Working in an orphanage. There are things I'd try part time, e.g. bar tending, waitressing, face painting, hair dressing (if I had the skills), and some others. If I could have any job in the world though I would choose working in a really well paying international kindergarten in either Spain or Switzerland. I would really like to live in both of those countries at one point in my life, so getting a job there would be great. 

Day 10: Your guilty pleasure (or pleasures!)

First of all I don't know why there is an exclamation mark after 'pleasures' but I will just ignore it. I have a few but I am embarrassed to write about them, I will write about the least awkward one. Taylor Swift.

I never thought I'd confess this to someone outside of my family, but I know every single one of her songs. Except 1 which I didn't know existed until a few days ago. It isn't like I think she is 'that great' or anything, I just find her entertaining and listen to her music. 

So yeah there you have it.

Day 8

Day 8: A moment you felt the most satisfied with your life.

I don't have one great, big moment when I felt the most satisfied with my life, but I have a lot of small moments when my life was pretty perfect. 

-Moving to Törökbálint (the city I live in now) on my own and working was one of those moments. It feels really good that I am able to support myself and live my life without relying on help from my parents or other people. 

-Traveling can also be added to that list. It feels so good whenever I check another country off in the list of countries I have been to in the world. 

-Finishing high school was an amazing feeling, just knowing that I was done and could finally move on and do better things was so great. 

-Doing a selfless deed for someone is very satisfying too, the feeling you get when you do something or give something, no matter how small, for/to someone that they couldn't do/get themselves is priceless.

Those are the ones that came to my head first, I am sure there are way more. For sure when I get into college and actually start going I will feel pretty damn happy with my life. 

Day 7

Day 7: Your favorite childhood toys.

As most little girls I was super into barbies and stuffed animals. I had this stuffed raccoon which was my favorite toy in the world, and I would sleep hugging it every night till it got flat but I loved it just as much. I got it when I was 6 or 7. When I was 13 I found out I was allergic to dust, and the doctor told me I shouldn't keep anything in my room which collects dust, which meant I had to give it away.

Raccoons are still the cutest animals ever:

Day 6

Day 6: Your zodiac sign and if you think it fits your personality.

I am a Pisces, according to Wikipedia this is what my personality should be like: 

Personality

Western astrologers assert that Pisceans are perceptive, emotional, and receptive. Notorious for being highly sensitive, they are also said to be desperately afraid of ridicule, as the sign is deemed "unfortunate." Pisces are a mutable sign, which makes them receptive, and susceptible to change. As a bicorporeal sign, astrologists believe that events in Pisceans lives are prominently repeated, suggesting that they may marry several times and that misfortunes never come singly. However according to astrologer Max Heindel, the Piscean's "good fortune also comes in multiple."

Conforming to the traditional astrological belief of the dual nature of the Piscean, in part seeking enlightenment in the "unseen realm," they are said to be "dreamy, mystical, and artistic." Edgar Cavce, an alleged psychic, has been cited as an example of such a Piscean. It is also been said that Pisceans are the quietest among the twelve zodiacal signs, and that they are good workers. In line with their association with feet, Pisceans have been described as being "never quite satisfied when sitting," preferring to be standing or walking.

______________________

Some of the things listed above describe me perfectly: emotional, highly sensitive, receptive, susceptible to change,  "good fortune also comes in multiple", preferring to be standing or walking over sitting. Meanwhile other things such as: 'unfortunate', the idea that misfortunes never come singly, dreamy and mystical, don't exactly describe me. 

I don't think you can describe every person born under the Pisces sunsign the same way. To give a direct answer: Yes I feel that my sign describes me perfectly.

Day 5

Day 5: Your favorite comfort foods and why.

Chocolate: Probably the reason why chocolate is my main 'go to' food when I'm feeling down is because in my work place I am given chocolate very often and so when I feel like eating away feelings it's normally the best option of what I have in the house. 

Ice cream: It is the best food to eat any time and any where and just makes me happy in general.

Pizza: When I don't have any good food in the house and need something to make me happy I normally just order pizza. I have a really good priced pizza place down the street from my house and always go there or order from there.

On other news, I drew this picture recently and thought I'd post it:

Day 4

Day 4: Your views on religion.

This is going to be a complicated subject to write about. Everyone believes in something, be it themselves, someone else or a greater power but it doesn't mean they are religious. A lot of times people are religious just for show and it doesn't go any deeper than that. I'm not religious but it doesn't mean I don't believe in God.... I think I've posted this video on my blog before but it describes how I feel about this subject:

Day 2 and 3

I forgot about my 30 Day Challenge on the second day since I have a brilliantly amazing mind. I am just going to do day 2 and 3 today.

Day 2: Where you'd like to be in 10 years

I am not one of those kinds of people who has every year of my life planned out till I die. I do have some goals that I would like to be done with in 10 years though. I'd like to be done with college and working on opening or have already opened either a kindergarten or an orphanage. I'd want to know what country I want to stay in permanently and not be moving around anymore. Probably either be married or in a stable relationship and possibly have a child. I'd like to have visited Ireland by then and have most if not all the stuff on my bucket list finished by then. Most of all though I'd want to be content with where I am in life.

Day 3: Your top 5 pet peeves:

-Hair: I cannot stand when someone has a random strand of hair that isn't attached to their heads on them. Even if it is a stranger standing in front of me at a crossing I will have to fight back the urge to pull it off. 

-Styrofoam: I HATE the sound of someone running their hands against Styrofoam, or it scraping against the wall. It makes me want to cut my ears off.  

-Loud chewing: When you can hear someone chewing while they eat and there is no other sound around to distract you is like torture.

-People who walk slow in front of me: It is really annoying when people walk really slow in front of you on the street in the kind of situation where you can't pass in front of them. Especially when they decide to stop randomly and you have to just wait.

-When people sneeze repeatedly: I know how annoying it is when you have allergies or are sick and sneeze all the time. I try super hard not to get annoyed at people who do, but at the same time I really really hate hearing them sneeze. It is like the room is being filled up with germs while a person makes horrid sounds close to you.

From now on I will try to post daily, especially during the holiday season when I have plenty of time.

Merry Christmas to everyone!

30 Day Challenge, Day 1

This is the best from all the 30 Day Blog Challenges I found. Some subjects will be great to write about, others not so much. I will do my best.

Day 1: Your current relationship. If single, discuss being single. 

I don't really know what there is to discuss about being single. Being in a relationship is really stressful, so to be honest I would rather be single.
I guess there are upsides and downsides to both, but at this moment I am perfectly happy at the place I am in in my life and being single is great. 

December 16

So I've been neglecting my blog for a while now not only because I didn't have time to post, but also because my computer got so bad that I only used it when I really had to. Thankfully now I have a new one, which is even better then my last one. I am super happy for it.

Besides that we had pretty big show with my dance group, we recently got 3 new members so I'm not the newest one who knows the least anymore. :D The show went great and I enjoyed learning the new dances and practicing for it. I'm only gonna post this one picture as I didn't like the rest. 

I miss writing on my blog, it's been a long time since I made a post just for the sake of writing.

This is my last week of work before the holiday. It has been super stressful. We will have the Christmas Show with the kindergarten kids on Saturday, and we are preparing literally day and night for it. So I am beyond exhausted. I hope it will turn out good in the end. After that I plan on posting a lot more. I am going to do a 30 day blog challenge starting this month, I'll post more about it later, I am happy about it as it'll get me to write more.  

Until then goodnight!

--Nat

Laptop Problems

So my computer is officially physically handicapped. 

I've been using it like this for 3 days now. I was just moving the screen lower when it appeared the guarantee should probably cover it, should find out tomorrow. 

I'm praying everything works out in the cheapest way possible, I'll keep you updated. 

Bye!

Sicily

My trip to Sicily was amazing, I had such a great time. I miss being there. 

Here are some of my tourist moments:

 

 Since the cities I was in were all near the volcano most everything is made out of volcanic ash, this is still pretty fresh.

 there was a giant jellyfish on the shore

 Etna Volcano

 we went to this halloween party

 best pizza of my life!

 you can't get much sexier than this

 huge cactus 

It was a really frikin beautiful place and I loved the Italian people even though almost no one spoke English. I hope I can go back again some day.