Sometimes people hurt you by mistake and sometimes they do it on purpose, the thing is how do you know when it's intentional and when it's not?
I wish I had the answer to that, and I wish I could just decide if the person is still worth being friends with after they hurt you, even if it was on purpose. I don't know everyones life, and for all I know they could have done it to prevent themselves from greater hurt, or to keep a friend, or maybe they are just trying to please you. Me personally, I HATE FLATTERY, I'd rather you tell me you hate me to my face, then act all nice and hate me inside. I can deal with hurt like that, what I don't know how to deal with is hearing things which hurt from someone else. Every person is selfish, no one is completely selfless, I most definitely have a lot of times when I made decisions that will hurt others only because it benefits me. What I think every person should consider when they make a friend is ‘what can I do for this person’ not ‘what can this person do for me.’ A lot of my friends have been there for me when I have had trials and problems, and I tend to think because I have had it good in the past I expect it to be the same now. But that is not possible, sometimes people have to look at what they can give their friend more then what their friend can give them. It is really hard for me to be friends with people who hurt me, my attomatic reaction is how can I cut of contact, how can a person be worth being friends with if they don’t give a damn about the way I feel. But maybe I should look at it as: they don’t have to consider me a friend, I will still be there for them and help them no matter what they do to me. Care for the person but don’t expect them to care for you, that’s how it is these days. That way when they do something in the long run which shows they didn’t care the whole time, or you find out something which they did which is super mean it won’t be so bad, maybe it will still hurt, but then you can always think; “I knew this was gonna happen.” Hahaa well I just made it sound like no one can ever be trusted, that is not true, just you have to find the right people, and never give everything because everyone is human, I bet I hurt people millions of times, some maybe intentionally and some I don’t know about and never will. And I can honestly say I care about my friends feelings, now how does that click? It doesn’t, it all comes down to being honest with yourself and giving more than you take. No one is perfect and everyone makes mistakes. Therefore I decided instead of running away from my problems I should face them, decide what will help others. If they hurt you pay them back with good deeds. Don’t be stupid and let them control you, but don’t try to control them either. It won’t pay of in the long run.
That is what I think and what I believe….
Confession: This is acctually writen to a certain person, but I am way to shy to send it to them :p so I don’t know if the person still reads my blog or it was just a one time thing, but even if it never reaches the person it’s good for me to get it out, and maybe it will help someone else.
3 comments:
Aww man that's true!!
A friend is said to be, like a brother, or sister. They can be pains in the ass sometimes, but they'll always be there for you. Every person is different, has different ways to react to things, but in the end their mind follows a similar pattern to yours.Sometimes you got to ask yourself, what would you do if you were them? Put yourself in their shoes, it can clear up a lot of blind spots you had about that person. If you don't know what's going on with that person, ask them. Or talk about the way you feel, if you don't you'll never know what happened and it will be like burden you carry maybe not all your life, but for a while.
How do you know when its intentional and when its not?
People generally won't want to hurt you just cause, they have a reason, whether you did something to them or they're jealous or are seriously retarded and just plain mean. In which case, they're not even worth to be called your friends. If you've done something bad to a friend which resulted in them giving you a lil of what they call payback, then ask for their forgiveness and try to make amends, after that there's not much you can do, well you can beg on your knees and say you'll wash they're laundry everyday, but I don't suggest that.
but yeah, I'm sorry about all that, it's not easy seeing a friend say and do things that hurt you especially when you've put so much into the friendship to forgive and let things pass.
But I think sometimes its just not worth it
Man, it's been ages since I've talked to you
We have so much to catch up on
I love you so much nala!
Wow!... this is really beautiful in a sad way. Hmm, did that sound weird? Okay, I guess I should explain more, tehehe.
Like, the way you write it--it's so real, alive and heartfelt but at the same time it makes me sad. Sad someone would hurt you, sad to know there are people who just don't think before they say or do something hurtful... or maybe they did think and that makes it even worse.
But I love it how you end it so positively, that you don't let it get you down even if it really hurts.
I love you Nala! I want you to know that and yeah, like Sandy said, WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN WOMAN! ahaha I hope to catch you online very soon! MUAH! :)
Profound Nat... I'm so proud to see a my talks taking effect in such good results *snicker*.
Just jking...
Yeah, good 4 u. Don't run away from your problems; and take ur friend's advice via those other comments up there. Merry C-mas.
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