Regret

Sometimes you do things you regret, and even though it kills you you just can't change the past. Right now I really want to go back, change yesterday, relive it, wake up in a good mood earlier, been on time, worked out everything, stayed home in the evening....everything would have been better, I wouldn't be laying in bed with a horrible hangover, I wouldn't have others working for me while I just lay down and do nothing, I wouldn't have caused people to freak out and cry, I don't know why it happened, but there is a reason for everything in life. I'm NEVER going to one of those parties again! My head is killing me, can't eat or drink anything, can't smell or think about food without feeling like throwing up. I barfed 5 times this morning, and many more times yesterday can't keep water down. Obviously made my dad, Jo and Joy very upset..............along with others, I guess I learned my lesson, and hate myself in the process. I was told not to feel condemned, told that it's like being the wool that the cat tosses back and forth in his paws, told not to cry, but sometimes you just have to follow your feelings, sometimes crying makes things better...............I don't know, this is kinda embarrassing..everything is right now, just gonna cut it of here........hope things will be better tomorrow. My dads leaving tomorrow, donno why everything has to hit at once, but I guess that's life. :(